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Monday, May 9, 2011

Morning all.  Welcomed a little boy into the family yesterday so will be scarce for the next few days at least.  Check back later in the week or start of next.

In the meantime, here is Maxim's Hot 100 for the year.  Where's Kate UptonMiranda freaking KerrBrittney Palmer?  And Cameron Diaz fourth?  Katy Perry second? Seriously?  Discuss in the comments if you will.


gbvh said...


BronxBomber said...

congrats man.

Joe said...

Congrats, Tony. Was it the same day Jeter hit his two homeruns?

bukkake said...

Time for Bukkake's annual weigh in on the Maxim Hot 100.

91. Erin Andrews - have never understood what the big deal is?

82. Kelly Kelly - I stopped watching wrestling many moons ago but this broad makes my channel surfing stop dead in it's tracks.

80. Danica McKellar - Winnie? I always loved that show The Wonder Years. Now I can masturbate to it too? Win - win! What a time saver! Multi-tasking at it's best!

78. JWOWW - with apologies to our gracious host, The TBek, I find anything Jersey Shore revolting.

72. - Stacey Kiebler - see #82, but to a lesser degree.

68. - Anna Paquin - not hot. end of discussion.

64. - Miley Cyrus - WTF? do dudes really find her hot? I mean dudes that are not pedophiles? Creeeeeepy...

58. Christina Aguilera - are you fucking kidding me? Is this the Hot 100 list from 1999? This fat drunk looks like something at last call in the Purple Onion (rest it's soul).

56. - Christina Hendricks - hard to argue with huge, fat tits on a redhead.

51. Nicole Sherzinger - I can never decide if I would rather fuck her or punch her in the face. Maybe both? At the same time?

44. Anna Farris - furthest thing from attractive on this list. Fucking ugly.

42. Emma Stone - makes me think about sex crimes.

40. Hillary Duff - I would love to DP her with her husband while wearing a Mike Comrie Oilers Jersey (from his first Oil stint back in the early part of the decade). We would let her big nose sister, Haylie join in just so I could pull out of Hillary's ass and utter the greatest line ever "Want to taste your sisters ass?"

38. Lindsey Lohan - are you fucking kidding me? This whore is so beyond washed up.

35. Kim Kardashian - over rated. over exposed. I bet she shits like a rabid farm animal with that massive ass.

34. Avril Lavigne -another one I have never understood. This annoying cunt has never done anything for me.

30. Amanda Bynes - one of my all time faves, I keep a rape kit and bone saw in my car at all times just in case of a chance encounter.

25. Britney Spears - huh? has she been in Hustler yet? Doing a photo spread where she is pissing on a black guy?

22. Rhianna - huge forehead. worst music ever. annoying as fuck. I would not give her the pleasure of a Chris Brown beatdown. I wish this whore would just go away.

20. Taylor Swift - I would punch this horse faced cunt in the throat. Tall, gawky, no sexuality at all.

19. Anna Kournikova - why is this list full of broads that were hot in the 90's?

14. Scarlett Johansson - love those tits and lips.

13. Kayley Cuoco - last year when this list came out I didn't even know who she was. A year later I have splattered my keyboard with jizz numerous times after Google Image searching pics of her in lingerie.

8. & 5. Natalie Portman & Mila Kunis - will never think of one without the other ever again. Greatest movie scene ever.

4. Cameron Diaz - ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!?!?! This makes me angry. This washed up old leatherface is ridiculous. She was hot in 1996. Not since. Was Julie Roberts unavailable for the 4 spot? Why do these rags keep promoting spoiled fruit?

3. Katy Perry - she should be #1. The fact she is not shows this list is bogus. I would eat a yard of shit to get to her ass pipe.

1. Rosie Huntington-Whiteley - huh? who the fuck is that? Are huge foreheads in vogue right now?

To conclude, I must comment on GBVH's post. Beckinsdale does belong, no doubt. Top 15 for sure. Aniston is another washed up whore who has had too many dicks and bad movies to be remotely attractive anymore. If I have to sit through one more of her fucking shitty movies with my wife where she plays THE SAME ROLE OVER AND OVER (the nice girlfriend who always has a surprised look on her face)...

That is all.

gbvh said...

Coming from a guy who thinks Katy Perry, that fashion-faux-pas, cake-of-makeup hipster loser with the equally loser boyfriend, should be number one?

With the above being the case, I'm O.K. with Bukkaks thinking the Aniston ain't top-100 material.

gbvh said...

. . . and suddenly "type of role she plays in a movie" is part of Bukkaks's hot-or-not equation!?

man, someone has clearly hit his Carlsberg Years.


bukkake said...

I might just fuck her loser boyfriend while I'm at it. I am a sick fuck, GBVH. I do not know why I like the things I do. I just know I enjoy those fat, white creamy jugs.

gbvh said...

i believe this might be more up your alley, bukkaks.

new-found respect?: