Eff You, Crew

Dallas Stars, Texas Rangers and Liverpool owner Tom Hicks has decided that after the Sean Avery fiasco, future Stars free agents must undergo psychological testing. No word if future Rangers need to undergo performance enhancing drug testing or if any future Reds need to be tested for post game thuggery in pubs...a full slate of international games have taken over the soccer world, except in the MLS where Toronto FC will travel to Columbus to face the defending champion Crew, and bring 2,000 of their fans along. TFC is +404 on the money line for this one, thanks in part to being minus Carl Robinson and Amado Guevara, who are off playing qualifying games for Wales and Honduras, respectively. Wonder if the TV coverage (GoalTV at 7pm) will show a sign the TFC fans made that reads "Fuck You, Crew"..after being called a bad example because of his drug addled past by Pele, soccer legend Diego Maradona replied that he wasn't sure if Pele was a good example or a bad example because he lost his virginity "to a man." It may be 2009, but never too late for a little homophobia it seems...sometimes you see a coach get fired and figure "he'll have a job in five minutes." This is not one of those times. Canada's Men's National soccer team finally put an end to the joke that was Dale Mitchell's reign. Only thing I can't figure is why they took so long. Don't expect to see Mitchell near any team with aspirations again...the NCAA train just keeps on rolling with the first Elite Eight games today - quarterfinals in every other sport. Liking UConn to down Missouri and Villanova to knock out Pitt...for today's PTP, playing France -1 -103 at Lithuania. That one kicks off at 3:45.

Craptors at it again

I've heard some suggestions for improving the NFL's overtime format but here is a new one that is said to be gaining steam: first team to score six points wins. That's fantastic and eliminates a lot of the current method of winning the toss, picking up a couple first down and kicking a winning field goal, while not getting to the lame college method of starting at the opposing team's 35 with both getting equal chances to win. This idea is most like the actual game. Make it happen, Roger Goodell...the Dallas Stars are 15-6-3 since ditching Sean Avery. GM Brett Hull may have screwed up signing him, but he deserves credit for changing course when most GM's would stubbornly stick to their initial instinct...Stephen A. Smith has not backed off one bit from his statement that Chris Bosh will leave the Toronto Raptors when his contract expires after next season. And the more Bosh tries to play it as made up while not saying he wants to stay, you have to give it some credence...Bosh and the Raptors were killed in Cleveland last night, and tonight get Kobe Bryant and the LA Lakers at home. Fortunately, this one is on TSN2 so most won't see the senseless slaughter of the Raps. I'd contemplate betting the Lakers even at -100...new poll question at the right. Get your vote in...not sure which Jim Rome take on Michael Phelps is funnier. That his bong rips explain the 10,000 calories he packs in a day, or that with his lung capacity, he must have crushed all the weed in that house in one shot...202 WWE Diva pics. Why? Because 201 would not be enough...if you're ever contemplating plastic surgery, here are 30 reasons why it is a bad idea...when you think your job sucks, consider that there is someone that was getting paid to rub hot liniment oil all over Roger Clemens for a time, including on his beanbag. Seriously. That comes from the new Joe Torre/Tom Verducci book "The Yankee Years". Added bonus from the book, according to Sports Illustrated's Alex Belth? It reminds us how great Alex Rodriguez really is...if you heard about the PETA ad that was banned as being "too hot" for Super Bowl Sunday but haven't seen it, here's your chance. Whatever your opinion, it probably wasn't as steamy as the porn that was shown for a time on an Arizona station. Here are the rest of the ads, if you care...back later with the PTP. Still sour over last night's fourth quarter deluge to push the game over...hope NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman doesn't read the Toronto Sun, because this piece on the state of the NHL from Bill Lankhof would likely ruin his day. Illuminating stuff for those with their heads in the sand about the health of the NHL...have a great Wednesday.

Wednesday, December 24th, 2008

What the hell is up with Brian Baldinger's finger?...incredibly, 67% of NBA players polled by Sports Illustrated picked the LA Lakers to win the championship. That's an overwhelming number. If the media had a vote, Chuck Swirsky would've voted for the Chicago Bulls...New York Yankees GM Brian Cashman is mastering the free agency game, dropping a big opening bid on CC Sabathia to flatten the market, and going under the radar on Mark Teixera and shocking everyone at the 11th hour. Heading into a new stadium and having $90 million come off the books could not have been better timed...oh, Stephen A. Smith still thinks the Yankees should sign Manny Ramirez...the Arizona Cardinals are the first team since the 1961 Oakland Raiders to trail by 28 or more at the half in consecutive weeks. They're one team that has something to show in Week 17, even when they really don't...two guys the NFL should mic on Sunday; San Diego Chargers QB Phillip Rivers and the Denver Broncos QB Jay Cutler. These two can't stand each other, and no doubt there will be some big talk on Sunday night...the Toronto Maple Leafs were drilled 8-2 by the Dallas Stars last night. The Stars have won three of four since dumping Sean Avery...come to find out there is an offence in the Toronto Blue Jays: a sex offence. A choreographer of one of the Jays dance troupes got busy with a 15-year old and - wait for it - taped the affair...I hate Notre Dame, their coach and their fans, but am super thankful they're one half of a Bowl game on an otherwise empty sports calendar tonight. They face Hawaii in the Sheraton Hawaii Bowl. And where is Bukkake Bowl Picks?..Dallas Maverick Dirk Nowitzki is talking of taking a paycut to help land one of the big free agents in 2010, the same time he is a free agent. Hey, isn't Chris Bosh from Dallas?...all the best to you and yours this Christmas Eve, and yes, back tomorrow!

Wednesday, December 3rd, 2008

Memo to Brett Hull: next time you survey your players about signing a guy like Sean Avery and they say "don't do it" - or Avery himself - you best listen. Avery has been suspended by the league, and would have been by the Dallas Stars, for referencing Calgary Flames defenceman Dion Phaneuf's girlfriend Elisha Cuthbert as his "sloppy seconds". On the ice, that stuff is the norm. Off it and to the media? Juvenile in the extreme. He's likely done in Dallas like Debbie, and what GM would pick up a guy that would bring that kind of infamy to the league? I've got one: Brian Burke...New York Giants receiver Steve Smith was robbed at gunpoint last Thurday. Anybody know if Plaxico Burress has an alibi? I'm a little sour it only came to me today after Burress self-inflicted gunshot wound: Plaxico beat another safety. Word is that he faces a minimum 3.5 years in the crowbar motel if convicted and New York mayor Michael Bloomberg has already gone on record as saying he'd be disappointed if he wasn't convicted. Nice knowing you, Plax. He's done for the season, and playoffs...after New England Patriot Wes Welker got de-cleated Sunday, here's fifteen fantastic hits in the NFL this year...and while we are at it, how about some great stadium sex acts...finally in today's video fun: Florida State Tuba Players vs. Wet Football Field. Who ya got?...as always, USC coach Pete Carroll is showing his opposition all kinds of respect. NCAA rules specify that a visiting team wears white or they'll forfeit a timeout per half. Pretty hefty penalty for such a triviality, no, timeouts being important and all? No biggie to Carroll. He wants his Trojans in red when they face UCLA...in a decision that should surprise nobody, Manchester United winger Cristiano Ronaldo earned the Ballon d'Or as European player of the year. Unlike his EPL award for the same earlier, he actually thanked his teammates for this one...a mere 39 point loss for the Toronto Raptors as they visited Denver last night. Sam Mitchell needs to go. His "best before" date is about as gone as Charlie Weis...have a great Wednesday.

Wednesday, November 26th, 2008

Last year, Lebron James wore a pair of pinstriped shoes in New York for his beloved Yankees when the Cleveland Cavs visited. Last night, he wore another pair of shoes paying tribute to New York. There hasn't been such an overt display of desire since Michael Jackson last went for a ride on the merry-go-round...sounds like turmoil isn't merely restricted to one team in Dallas. Said Boston Bruins Marc Savard to Mike Modano during the chippy game a few weeks back on the subject of Steve Ott and Sean Avery: "too bad you'll be retiring after having to play with these clowns." Said Modano: "I know."...I love coaches - regardless of what level - going beyond the cliche when it comes to media dealings. And here's the latest: South Florida football coach Jim Leavitt. This is a beauty. Warning: you may detect sarcasm from Mr. Leavitt...the Donovan McNabb to the Chicago Bears rumors have started already. If you're the Bears, why do you want McNabb? He's been on a downward spiral for years, incapable of staying healthy, and, well, doesn't know the rules as we saw last week...the Pittsburgh Pirates have signed a pair of pitchers that haven't thrown baseballs before the last year and were discovered after winning a javelin throwing contest. In India. Yeah, that'll reverse years of futility...lost in the shuffle yesterday was another day of Champions League action that saw Manchester United and Real Madrid, among others, advance to the round of 16 when things start to get a lot more serious. Up today is another round of matches. Check out TSN, TSN2 and Setanta at 2:45 for a bevy of games...add the Globe & Mail to the list of Toronto media outlets that is questioning whether Sam Mitchell is long for the Toronto Raptors coaching job. I'll say this much: a loss tonight to the Charlotte Bobcats and it'll be a surprise if Mitchell makes it through the week...double digit underdogs in the NFL this year are 20-5 against the spread...as predicted last week, fading the Carolina Panthers was a good play because those that played the Detroit Lions the week prior were 0-10 against the spread heading into last week. Make that 0-11. Tampa Bay? You're on the clock for 0-12 this week...Bill Romanowski either has some insight, or has been hitting the pharmaceuticals a little too hard: he told Hardcore Sports Radio's "Drive This" that the New England Patriots will trade Tom Brady this off-season and keep Matt Cassell...interesting to learn that the Anaheim Ducks have all of five players signed for next year. While that may mean loads of cap room, it also means that a certain former General Manager of theirs may have some easy pickings for his future team...have a great Wednesday.