Saturday, May 10th, 2008 - I Want To Be Sam Mitchell's Real Estate Agent

Maxim's Hot 100 includes six ladies Derek Jeter tapped: Scarlett Johannson, Gabrielle Union, Mariah Carey, Jessica Biel, Vanessa Minillo and Jessica Alba...Avs head coach Joel Quenville just came loose. If anybody is at the controls in Leafland, I suggest they pay attention. Fast...Chelsea's central defender Ricardo Carvalho believes fellow Portuguese player Cristiano Ronaldo could go Jose Calderon and fold under the pressure of the final day of the EPL season, costing Manchester United, because they're "over-reliant" on him. Not only will he be proven wrong there, I'm going to take Ronaldo to show Carvalho who wilts in Moscow in the Champions League final in 10 days time...since 2000, only Greg Popovich (2003) won the NBA Coach of the Year and lasted more than two seasons with the same team. If Sam Mitchell survives the next season, he'll become the second. When the others who didn't make it to year three includes guys like Larry Brown, Mike D'Antoni and Avery Johnson, I want to be Sam's real estate agent...fav Canadian female sportscaster: Sarah Meehan. Wow. The great Thin Lizzy is a fan of Sarah. Warning: Creepy video alert!...if someone were to say Roy Halladay has four complete games in the first five weeks of the year, guessing you wouldn't assume he'd have a 3-5 record, no? If the Jays had any kind of offence, they're a minimum 4-5 games better than they are right now...Jalen Rose gave Stephen A. Smith a tongue lashing over his comments on Chris Bosh, for which Smith ultimately apologized to Bosh. Rose is a man. No doubt...a now former Florida Gator football player, Jamar Hornsby, has been charged with using a credit card, stolen, from a deceased female Florida student. In what will surely end up being a call to the Karma Police, the dead girls parents were getting the bills for his purchases, which were several over the course of six months. He won't be in a private box in hell with O.J, but he's gonna have real good seats...have a great Saturday. Back Sunday for more!

Friday, May 9th, 2007 - Glory, glory Man United!

The final weekend of the EPL is here. I'm almost entirely confident Manchester United hoists the trophy when all is said and done...8 of 42 in the series, Lebron? Show up anytime...Cowboys QB Tony Romo is attempting to qualify for the U.S. Open golf tourney. Yes, he's that good...Brandon Webb is now 8-0. He could well win 25 this year with the DBacks actually having an offence this year...Jim Rome had Roy Halladay on his show and jokingly told him that he doesn't need to finish every game he starts...there are rumblings that the NHL is going back to ESPN after a couple years in the wilderness of "the cycling network" as Tony Kornheiser calls it. Wise move, that. I'm sure that Gary Bettman will be spinning hard to ignore his previous proclamations of what a great deal he had in place...about the Leafs signing free agent Fabian Brunnstrom? Nevermind...those videotapes formerly used by the Patriots turned over to the NFL do indeed show them stealing signals. Me suspects that Bill Belichick could be looking at a healthy suspension...Mike Mussina has won four straight? With that stuff of his, that is incredible. His off-speed stuff is in the high 60's...have a great weekend.

Thursday, May 8th, 2008 - .500 Up and Blow Up's

Chelsea manager Avram Grant has mused about winning 18-0 this weekend over Bolton to take the EPL title. Not happening, Avram…did you know that when Major League Baseball introduced the MVP award, you were not allowed to win it more than once? Strange…Georges St. Pierre is dating Mandy Moore. Nice pull, champ…AJ Burnett is right on course for another .500 season. Just waiting for the usual stint on the DL now…speaking of .500, going into last night, the Yankees were 8-8 at home, 9-9 on the road and 7-7 in games decided by one or two runs. They’re 4-4 against lefties and 13-13 against righties...good to see the NBA's MVP not pick up the award in a suit this year…for reasons unexplained and unfathomable, the Leafs are looking to hire an Associate GM - Dave Nonis - before hiring his boss…the latest story on the blow-up dolls in the ChiSox clubhouse in Toronto is that Roger Clemens has dated both…Phil Jackson is a career 15-0 in Game 1's with the Lakers, and 19-0 with the Bulls. Undefeated in the first swing game of a series. Might explain why he's got that many rings. Sam Mitchell? Nevermind…I recall Chuck Swirsky knocking Vince Carter for signing a contract and asking for a trade a couple years later. Wonder how he feels about a commentator signing in 2007 and bailing the next year?...yeah, Latvia brings a bunch of people to the World's. I get it…Kitchener Rangers coach Peter DeBoer is rumored to be in the running for jobs in Atlanta, Ottawa and Toronto. Oddly enough, he and Paul Maurice were roomates at one point, and remain friends…if the NBA moves too fast to get another round of playoffs started, the NHL moves too slow…the more this Marvin Harrison story develops, the more you have to think guys like Terrell Owens are loving it…word is that someone is revealed as pregnant on The Office season finale, which goes next week (my money is on Michael's on-again-off-again girlfriend Jan). There is also an Office spinoff coming midway through next season…have a great Thursday.

Wednesday, May 7th, 2008

RandoMango: Cedric "Pepper Spray" Benson's career rushing number is lower than Walter Payton's 1986 season...Chris Chelios says he's likely to return for next season. He'll be 47. Incredible...if the Philly Flyers win the Cup, that'll mark the second year a huge, physical side won the Cup...the Dallas Stars are a large +375 to knock off Detroit. Seems a worthy play the way they're going. I'm not convinced Detroit is that great, struggling some against Nashville and then smoking a beat up, punchless Avs squad, and coming out of an awful division...Jose Rijo, assistant GM of the Reds, says an all-star team of Red Sox and Yankees would beat an NL all-star team, such is the AL's dominance...since 2000, the highest percentage increase in MLB payroll belongs to Minnesota, with a 355% rise. The Jays check in 9th at 76.7%. The Yankees and Boston are 76.3% and 76.1% respectively. See, JP's plan to lead the East is working...the English Football Association is saying it is targeting a minimum goal of a semi-final appearance in 2010's World Cup or the 2012 Euro. Don't you usually look to move up in increments? You know, like, qualify for something first?...if there is talk of Ken Griffey Jr. getting moved, it must be May. I'd be sure if there was talk of Roger Clemens pitching in July...given how often Chuck Swirksy has historically hammered former Raptors he once slurped incessantly, I think the fitting send off is to hammer him in much the same way. You know, kind of a tribute to the man. I'll start with "the term 'a face made for radio' was created for a reason."...were the Celtics and Cavs using a college score clock last night? 76-72?...former national team captain Jason DeVos is retiring from soccer to broadcast Toronto FC games. Mo might consider inking him to anchor that defence...have a great Wednesday.

Tuesday, May 6th, 2008

RandoMango: In discussing the Leafs GM vacancy, Mats Sundin interestingly used the word "they" rather than "we" or "us"…ChiSox manager Ozzie Guillen went on another legendary tirade, this time hammering the Chicago media and to a lesser extent, Chicago fans in general…kinda strange how quiet the Marvin Harrison case has been. If you haven't heard, somebody got shot, and Harrison is being questioned. If he were a Bengal, this would be a far bigger story, no? Word is the bullets came from his gun so this story might gain traction now...during the college offseason, some guys work out. Some pick up a class. Some hit keggers repeatedly. Florida's Heisman winner Tim Tebow went to the Philippines and circumcised infants. How long 'til his scouting reports read he has "surgical precision" and can escape pressure by the skin of his, umm, nevermind…Eight Belles euthanization after the Kentucky Derby has caused major controversy. But the stats say for every 1,000 horses that have run the last 40 years, 1.5 will die, and those numbers have stayed consistent through that time. It just happens that Barbero and now Eight Belles have found out the answer to the question "for whom the bell tolls?" and gone to the great glue factor in the sky…word is Kobe Bryant will pick up his first MVP award today. Overdue might not be the most accurate word that comes to mind, but it is the first…the Yankees are 2-10 in games started by Ian Kennedy and Phil Hughes. Considering that, their injuries, and a meat grinder schedule and maybe I've been too hard on them after all…fading Brazilian soccer star and tranny lover Ronaldo is claiming to have done work for UNICEF in trying to rehab his image. Problem is UNICEF is saying they've had no affiliation with him. Maybe he figured playing against Barcelona who had UNICEF on their strips was close enough?...Affliction gear, banned by UFC?...have a tremendous Tuesday.

Monday, May 5th, 2008

Fox Sports Ken Rosenthal names John Gibbons as one of three managers on the hotseat…Roger Clemens lawyer says his client is getting "pummelled". In other news, the sky is blue…think rookies are getting paid out of line with their experience in the NFL? Tightend Vernon Davis is making $4 million more than multiple time Pro Bowler Jason Witten…honestly, the crowd-with-towels-and-same-coloured-shirts thing is more tired than "Who Let The Dogs Out?" a few years back. It needs to go away. It's entirely cookie cutter now. What I love about Toronto FC crowds is those shirts are all personally purchased, like real fans do and not trained seals…I don't often bother with Don Cherry, but when he noted the size difference between the Canadiens and Flyers after the Flyers wrapped up the series and the teams shook hands, he did hit the nail on the head there…now here is incentive: John Calipari's extension at Memphis pays him $5 million if he stays to the end of the contract...the Indianapolis Colts have 3 starters that have ever suited up for another team. That there is good drafting...yes, hockey fans, that was [b]Gary Roberts diving in yesterdays game against the Rangers[/b], and yes, the CBC colour man called him on it...I'll never understand how the NBA starts the second round for some teams while other first round series are still on...one more win and the Kitchener Rangers will have completed their steamrolling through the OHL playoffs, with a sole loss...West Ham boss Alan Curbishly said Manchester United deserved to win the EPL, before their game against United Saturday. Wonder how Chelsea felt about that?. Chelsea travel to face Newcastle United today and must win to maintain hope...it's Pittsburgh vs. Philly and Detroit vs. Dallas in the conference finals. Lots of seats available in Detoilet at a very reasonable $75 for anyone looking to make a road trip...have a great Monday.