Turko-douche

Classy of the NFL to send their legal team after New Orleans business people who are selling "who dat?" gear. All year it was fine but now that they're in the Super Bowl, the league wants its cut.

Won't it be a bit weird if the Indianapolis Colts win the Super Bowl the year after Tony Dungy left as head coach, same as the Tampa Bay Bucs did the year after he left them?

Michael Farber at ESPN.com looks at the Montreal Canadiens goaltending situation and decides that given Carey Price youth, it might not be too wise to give up on him just yet, provided of course he and Jaroslav Halak don't divide the locker room. Can't disagree with that logic.

One of Tiger Woods playtoys, a former Playboy model named Loredana Jolie, says that his sex fantasies were "not normal". Jolie also said that Eldrick was into gay sex as well. Woods also sent a text message to Rachel Uchitel saying he envisioned her having sex with Derek Jeter and Bones star David Boreanaz at the same time. Well at least this isn't getting weird.

The LA Kings are a prime contender to acquire high-scoring left wing Ilya Kovalchuk from Atlanta, but they're competing with Vancouver, Boston and another Eastern team for the two-time 50-goal scorer. Rest easy Maple Leafs fans, it won't be Toronto.

Roger Federer has advanced to the finals of the Aussie Open where he'll face Andy Murray. That's 23 straight semi-final appearances for Federer in a Grand Slam, and he's been in the final of 18 of the last 19 majors. Murray has played only one set above the minimum en route to the final, and has beaten Federer 6 of 10 times. On the women's side, Serena Williams will face Justine Henin in the final.

Minnesota Vikings QB legend Fran Tarkenton, who railed against OHB moving to the purple and gold in the summer, spared no feelings when he piled on after Sunday's meltdown, calling the play "stupid" and saying that quarterbacks of lesser stature wouldn't have made such a play. He finished with this gem: "We all get hit but he is flapping around and jumping around and he is getting hit and he talks in the soft voice. I would rather it be about the team and not [OHB]. I get the idea that it is more about [OHB] than the team. A quarterback is to make his teammates better but he is not about that." For the kids of the 80's that read here: That's Incredible!

Hedo Turkoglu likely had his best game as a Toronto Raptors in last night's come from behind win in New York, but he's got a long way to go before he'll be seen as a likeable guy by this fan when he handles a post-game interview with Jack Armstrong like this. I don't think Kobe Bryant or LeBron James would act like that. Asshat.

Kurt Warner is expected to announce his retirement from the NFL today. Somehow, I suspect he'll actually mean it, even though he's still more than capable of playing despite having a #1 pick waiting behind him. Next stop, Canton.

Former Pittsburgh Steeler Eric Green forcibly sodomized a transgendered woman. I only mention this because you don't hear that very often.

Have a great Friday, back in the morn.